Now I really need to make a decision and either accept Franciscan's offer or try for a program through the National Catholic Bioethics Center.
And the decision needs to happen today.
I know I've been praying so hard on this, to make the right decision, but if you happen to read this today, please pray for me as well. I really don't want to mess up on this. It probably sounds silly in the grand scheme of things...other people have so many more complex, harder issues to deal with, but all I've been praying on all week is this decision which will impact the next 1-2 years of my life. But at the same time, it is so big to me. And even though I asked Franciscan for the weekend to think on it, I still keep going back and forth. I think the thing is that either option is good and neither one is particularly bad. Each comes with it's own perks and downfalls (I made a list of pros and cons for each in Adoration on Friday).
In the long run, I know bioethics is what I want to study. And it's going to happen somehow, someway. The hard part is the possibility of turning down a (reallllly) good scholarship.
This prayer popped up on Facebook the other day, not too long after I got the news of the scholarship from Franciscan. It's a good one. With all my focus on this one thought, I've been praying a lot but finding my ability to engage in life and helpful devotions hindered. So this is relevant:
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| Courtesy of Ignatius Press |
You're in my prayers today dear sister.
ReplyDelete"Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." -Phillippians 4:6-8
I'm not sure that this is a helpful thought or not but it seems to me that these times in life are ultimately a question of trust. If your motivating desire is to honor God's will for your life then you don't need to be anxious that you will make the right choice. Even if it does not seem clear to you at the time God won't allow you to "make a mistake" in your discernment. I have every confidence that the decision you come to through "prayer and petition with thanksgiving" will be His will. Surely He honors our desire to do His will. Momma keep you dear sister.
Praying for you! Whatever decision you make, I have no doubt that God will make that path a fruitful one.
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